I’ll try to keep this intro space lean and without much fanfare. Here are my reflections as we approach the last quarter of this year and summing up some deep changes that have not only hallmarked this year, but my entire life and seeded some great new beginning for the future.
Becoming more Self-inquisitive:
Questions hold the power to shed light and bring forward answers and understanding. When directed at oneself with openness and honesty their power is even unimaginably greater. Being self-inquisitive doesn’t demand self-flagellation or hiding away in an ashram for a month (although there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!). It requires more attentiveness and building the habit to question your own habits and behaviour in the quest of understanding yourself better and uncovering those unconscious patterns that have been ruling your life despotically.
The resolve to do deeper shadow work:
In very close relation with being self-inquisitive, and many times within the same process, I found more determination to go deeper in my shadow work, that is bringing to light the darkest recesses of my subconscious that harbour fear and resistances of sorts. Some quick hints about this: when you feel resistance, that is where the pain point is. Don’t think or let yourself say “I’ll tackle it later” (diversion and self-sabotaging!) – just go, go, go for it there and then. When you hit a blockage which you cannot understand or find an answer to, go one level deeper by asking ‘where is this resistance or issue coming from?”. If you are open to the process, believe me, the answer will come.
A better & deeper understanding where to place my alliances and commitment:
This took me so long to get to grips with in my life and I feel I am still learning and learning. Being mindful where to place my alliances and commitment is a bit of a blanket statement because it covers so many areas of life. But what I mean as a whole by this is that I have learnt to stop fooling around with myself and wasting time in useless endeavours that are not aligned to my deeper mission in life. It’s about finally committing to a definite path and choosing your alliances (whether people, beliefs or tools) wisely.
The Power of Believing in me:
I continued to believe more in myself (this is an outcome of above – knowing where to commit). This is the one thing that by itself is life-changing and nothing short of a miracle. Believing in oneself is opposite of doubting oneself – the root of all problems.
The habit of nurturing the right thoughts:
Becoming more aware, and once again, committed, to keeping the house clean. What we think, we create (especially coupled with feeling/energy – see below). Our mental world is not some ghostly, vacuous place. It’s real and has effect on our world. So becoming more and more vigilant of which thoughts to discard and which to keep on nurturing is quite a biggie in self-development work.
Vowing to hold the energies up high:
Keeping the mental ‘holodeck’ clean is only part of the task. It’s also mostly about energies. Your energies dictate the health of your body, your influence on your surrounding, your happiness, even your luck, but most of all it determines your reality – and I am saying this knowing how strange it sounds. Noticing when energies are down (because of mood, emotional stress, others’ energies, etc) and trying one’s best to stay focused, aware and quickly and consciously returning to a more positive state before it goes down below a point where it can’t be managed so easily. Pushing up the vibes, can be achieved through several means – my favourites are breathing exercises, affirmations, changing body postures (into power postures), visualising highly positive episodes.
The deepening and solidification of believing in a higher intelligence:
Never had a doubt but there are grades on how solid you start believing in a higher order and in the unity of all consciousness, in spirit and in your divine Self. Taking this to higher levels means real spiritual growth.
Being open to change and moments of uncertainty:
Change and uncertainty will always be our most common nail biters. I believe that there was no conscious effort in this direction – some of the changes above propelled changes in other aspects of my life, this being one of them.
Understanding more the importance of Self-love and self-honesty:
Like believing in oneself, Self-Love and Self-Honesty are fundamental. You cannot move forward to a happier, inspired and fulfilled life without a good healthy dose of Self-Love and being truly honest with oneself. Honesty is also a crucial ingredient in self-enquiry and shadow work.
Learning to give up some things and let go of others:
It’s always about shedding away isn’t it? It truly is and if it isn’t yet clear to you by now – this process never stops. Why should it? There is always something to let go off even happy moments and good experiences. Life is about energy in motion. You stop, you stagnate. So letting go is both a part of doing shadow work but also the thrust forward that makes you move onwards and upwards in life.
Embracing middle age with grace and compassion:
Ah well, what can I say? It could have been lots of resistances, regrets or crises but luckily it came with grace and self-compassion for this ageing body. It’s actually a really beautiful thing if you can see it for what it is – A life passage and a transformative experience.